As I sit here trying to kill some nerves before my consultation with the oral surgeon, I figured it would be a great time to write about our proposal. I'm going to break it down into two parts--the story leading up to the proposal, and the aftershock and reactions.
Z and I had been talking about marriage for a while. Heck, we had been having the marriage talk since before our first anniversary. We always talked about "oh, well when we get married I want this...." or "when we get married I want to do it this way"...we've talked about how our lives will change, what we expect out of each other, how we planned to take steps to prevent divorce, and how we want our marriage to work. I knew from a few months in that this was the man that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, no doubt.
This spring, I was starting to get anxious. The joking had started a while back--whenever we were at the mall, one of us would say "Oh, there's a jewelry store!" or "oh, Diamonds Direct. Let's go there." But we never did. Looking back, I think both of us had some butterflies about going to look at rings for the first time. I knew he was saving up for it, but I didn't want to feel like I was pushing him into anything. I knew that I loved him--and it didn't matter if we were dating, engaged, or married.
One night in April, we finally decided it was time. I needed to pick up some pants at the dry cleaners at the mall, so I asked Z to tag along. One of us made mention of going to look at rings. We headed to the mall and before we drove past the jewelry store, I remember Z saying "I kind of want to go look"....so of course, I said "Let's go!" We spent about an hour perusing the store and looking at things that we liked and didn't like. I noticed that he had a lot of knowledge about diamonds that I didn't expect him to have. That was my first sign that he had actually taken the initiative to research things himself. We left the store with smiles on our faces, and I figured he would be popping the question soon. I should have known better. You see, Z is the kind of person who does his research before he buys ANYTHING. He makes sure that what he buys is the best for his money--even if that means paying more.
Then I started waiting--and waiting--and waiting. I was looking for any bit of a sign that he was nervous, or staying out late, being coy about things, or just acting different. I never saw any of that. He was being his normal self. I started to doubt that it was ever going to come! April passed, then May and June, and then July came. I had convinced myself that a proposal was coming no time in our near future. Our two year anniversary was fastly approaching, and I thought that it would pass with no sign of a proposal. I started to get really discouraged. Each time I would see someone get engaged, I got increasingly jealous. I really, really wanted Z to propose. I loved this man and I couldn't wait to spend the rest of my life with him as soon as possible. So WHY didn't he feel the same? Again, I put the thoughts back in my head that maybe he wasn't ready. I had to remember that we were in love and happier than pigs in mud. I didn't need a ring to be confident in that.
July first came, and we headed to the beach for our annual vacation with my family. For the first few days, I was in heaven, without a care in the world. The weather was hot, I got sunburnt, and I ate too much food. One night a few days into our vacation, I happened to be browsing facebook, and saw yet ANOTHER engagement. My mood turned sour immediately, and I couldn't kick it. I (selfishly) pouted for about 12 hours. Finally, Z caught on to the reason for my bad mood. We separated ourselves from everyone else and had a heart to heart. I left that conversation with the feelling that it wasn't going to happen while we were on vacation.
Once my mind was clear, I was able to get my mind off of things and jump right back into vacation. We helped bake cupcakes and make a cake (I mostly watched), we helped set up my aunt and uncle's backyard for the party, and we spent some time talking about our pending trip to New York. Everything was back to normal, or so it seemed.
July 4th came, and the day was perfect. We had the parade, rested for a while, finished setting up, and got ready for the party. The party was wonderful as usual--games, drinks, too much food, a magician, and good friends. Everyone started to disperse when it got dark. A small group of our closest friends stuck around and hung out underneath Lauren and Michael's house or in my aunt and uncle's backyard. My sister, Lauren and I even started having a mini dance party for 3. Once, when the songs were changing and I sat down to take a break, Z made mention that he saw fireworks. He said the he wished he could see them better, so I suggested we go walk on the beach. I thought nothing of it.
We walked hand in hand down to the beach access, having a conversation that I cannot recall. Once we got to the beach, we watched the fireworks go off on either side of us. It was dark, and there was hardly anyone out on the beach at that time of night. We watched for what seemed like a few minutes.
At one point, I turned around to see the fireworks on the opposite side of him, and when I turned back around, there he was, down on one knee with a ring box open. He said those 4 words that I had been waiting to hear--
"will you marry me?"
Stay tuned for the aftershock and the reactions tomorrow! :)